Posts Tagged ‘poetry’

Stop Copyrighted

I take a vow right now that I will not check my email for the hundredth time today! I promise that my email will remain closed until tomorrow morning. And I solemnly swear I will only check my email 2-3 times a day from now on.

I know, you are probably wondering what the heck is going on with me. I’ve been quiet for about a week, and then I come back with this craziness? Sometimes even I wonder about what goes on inside this head!

To clarify this situation, no, I didn’t suddenly become an email addict. Quite frankly, there’s not much that comes through my email addresses that is that alluring. It’s mostly spam, ads, and bills these days. Sounds real exciting, huh?

Actually, I’m turning into an email worrier. I recently decided I need to take my content writing seriously again, so I’m doing what I can to accept paid assignments once more. I’ve spent so much time this year doing my own thing (blogging, poetry, creative writing, etc.) that I’m worried I might be a little rusty. I used up over 12 hours a few weekends ago refamiliarizing myself with the sites I used to submit writing to. I even took some time out to research possible new opportunities.

The desire to challenge myself and be more than I currently am is strong. I want to see what my true potential is. However, I had forgotten how difficult it can be waiting for days to hear back from editors…IF I let the nervousness get out of control, that is.

I have a few submission under review, and it’s eating at me. I’m more nervous than a new father waiting for his baby to arrive. But then again, all my creations ARE my children. I put so much heart, soul, and time into molding my work. They are a reflection of me and everything I do, so (like I do with my actual children) I want to see them shine and soar. The thought of them failing to reach an important mark isn’t a pleasant one.

But the truth is no one should live constantly worried and anxious. It isn’t healthy. It isn’t productive at all. In fact, worrying too much wastes time and undermines confidence and talent. Worrying only leaves you with sleepless nights and stomach ulcers. It makes day-to-day life bitter and empty. And it makes you second guess your every move.

It’s time for me to move on beyond this worrying. I did my best with the assignments. If the editors don’t like what I submitted, it is there loss. It may not be what they are looking for, but that doesn’t mean my writing stinks. And even if I made some mistakes, I’m going to embrace that. Owning up to my mistakes is an important part of me evolving into the writer I’ve always want to be. I’d rather make a million mistakes and learn from them than to hide my writing away. Truly, the greater the risk the greater the prize–and I won’t ever be satisfied with only cereal-box prizes in life!

 

© 2013 Amanda R. Dollak
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My poor poetry journal!

 

I’m giving myself a mental slap across the face tonight. Just because no one else believes in my dreams or thinks they are worthwhile, it doesn’t mean I should give up and mope for the rest of my life. This is MY life. These are MY dreams. I know deep inside that I was meant to be a writer. It doesn’t matter whether or not the masses read my work. It doesn’t matter whether or not those close to me ever read what I write. It doesn’t matter whether or not I ever make any decent money for what I do. Staying true to my heart’s deepest desires is all that matters!

I am not me without writing. I can’t sleep right. I can’t think right. I can’t function if I stop for too long. You can argue all you want that I’m not cut out to be a famous writer. Well, maybe I’m not. But I assure you, I’m meant to be writer–plain and simple.

I am a writer…a writer is me. I MUST write to thrive. It has been that way since I first learned to read and write. Call it foolishness. Call it a waste of time. Call it whatever you want. However, it’s what I am…it’s what I do…and it’s what I’ll do until the day I die!

 

© 2013 Amanda R. Dollak

NaNoWriMo

I should be NaNo-ing the night away.  I haven’t worked on my NaNoWriMo novel since Saturday, so I’m increasingly getting behind on my word count.  I sat down at my desk at 8:30 pm to work on it tonight.  However, I have yet to write a single word to add to my current 4,000-word story…and it is after 1 am!

I know, where did the time go?  No, I didn’t fall asleep at my desk.  No, I didn’t get swept into the Facebook blackhole again.  No, I didn’t get distracted by games or anything considered a frivolous pastime.  Rather, I spent the last few hours consumed with other writing matters.

1.)  I searched for and added some new music for my writing playlist.  I meant to do it before NaNo started, but I never did finish my pre-NaNo checklist.  Fresh music equals fresh inspiration, so it was certainly a necessity, even though it doesn’t directly contribute to my NaNo word count.

2.)  I wrote another poem.  I am going through another fibromyalgia flare, either because I over did it this weekend with manual labor or because I’m still adjusting to the new strain of NaNo….or both.  Writing poetry about it, however, helps me cope with all the feelings that erupt because of my flare ups and helps me get recentered again.  Of course, I need to be recentered to focus on writing my novel, so again, time was spent away from NaNo, but it wasn’t a true loss.

3.)  I did some freelance writer paperwork.  Now, this definitely has nothing to do with NaNoWriMo.  Nevertheless, it had to be done.  Writing is my passion, but it is also my business and files are a part of any business.  It’s a boring and time-consuming process, but it is certainly a necessary evil.

4.)  I got sucked into writing a number of blog posts and articles (including this one).  Even with NaNo in full swing, I still have other writing obligations.  I have three blogs and write articles for a living.  Again, this isn’t beneficial to the novel-writing process…unless of course, you count blogging about why I’m not actively writing my NaNo novel right now.

5.)  I took notes for a new short story idea.  As some of you may know, I am working on a collection of short stories with a similar theme.  I’ve almost completed one of these short stories, and I’m collecting ideas for the subsequent ones.  Tonight, I added a third idea to my short story list.  What can I say?  Writing and inspiration only breed more writing and inspiration.  Since NaNo started, I’ve been flooded with countless new ideas…all of which are stubbornly vying for my attention.  You’ll have to excuse me when once in a while I get distracted by them.

6.)  I’ve come to a point in my NaNo novel where my plot is a little hazy.  I’m still trying to figure where to go next with it.  I already know the main plot points.  However, I need a transitional point right now and I’m a bit stuck.  I’ve been brainstorming and reworking my novel outline to try to fix this tiny snag.  I haven’t fixed it completely yet, but at least I can say I’ve made some progress.

What do you think?  Was my creative night worth slipping a little farther behind with NaNoWriMo?

© Amanda R. Dollak 2013

 

Public Domain (Harriet Roosevelt Richards 1867-1932)

Public Domain (Harriet Roosevelt Richards 1867-1932)

I am guilty–through and through–of neglecting my blogs again.  The weeks leading up to my wedding grew more and more hectic.  And the chaos hasn’t relented even though I’ve been officially married for 11 days.  I know, excuses…excuses.  But we are all human and time is limited.  Sometimes we neglect for a time the things and people we love for other things and people we love.  The challenge is trying to juggle everything and everyone without dropping a single thing or making anyone feel left out.  I obviously am NOT a master at this, especially since I have a chronic illness complicating an already crazy schedule. So, forgive me and let’s move on to some wonderful news: I’m working on my first book!

Some of you may know that I consider myself a creative writer first and foremost.  Although I adore blogging and enjoy informative writing, my love of writing blossomed from my desire to make my own stories, poetry, and songs.  Since poetry is the only creative writing that I’ve published so far, I tend to neglect my first love–except for an occasional poem here and there.  Right now, creative writing doesn’t help too much to pay the bills, so it gets put on the back burner far too often.

Well, my muse decided this week enough is enough!  I have been mulling over an idea for a collection of short stories for months.  In fact, the first story has tried to practically write itself on several occasions.  However, with wedding plans and other obligations, I did my best to set it aside until I had some more free time.  The free time never DID come…so my creative mind decided Sunday night that I had wait long enough.  I found myself desperately trying to get some sleep when BAM! inspiration slammed me in the face and refused to let me go until I wrote several pages.  I was up until nearly 2:00 am writing this short story even though I knew that I had be up at 6:30.  When the perfect moment strikes (at least in the opinion of your muse) you don’t argue or fight it.  You ride it wherever it will take you.  Anything less would be insane.

I am about halfway finished with this first tale of the collection I hope to publish as my first book.  I already have the rest of the story outlined, and my mind is already mulling over the details of the rest of the short stories.  Who knows if this first book of mine will be anything to brag about.  It might even end up stinking.  However, it MUST be written.  Some invisible force has been insisting for months that I’m meant to finish these short stories.  And no matter what, I WILL finish them!  There is no other way to get back the reins of my life.

Has inspiration ever hijacked your life and refused to let go until you wrote a literary piece?  If so, I’d love to hear about it.

Beach 001

Some of you have noticed that I’ve been AWOL for quite some time.  I spent over a month on a blogging-free vacation.  Although I love blogging, I needed some time away.  During this vacation of mine, I was the maid of honor at my mother’s wedding.  I took a week long vacation to SC with my family and had the honor of introducing my two children to the beach and the magnificent ocean.  I also spent some time working on my novels and writing some poetry.  But most importantly, I took some time to rest, relax, and de-stress.

It is amazing how stressed, overwhelmed, and bent out of shape we can become after having far too much on our plates for far too long.  Sometimes we just have to stop, shake things up a bit, and get away.  That is what I had to do, but now I feel refreshed and renewed.  I’m back and feeling better than ever!

How are you all doing?  What have you been up to while I was off on my vacation from blogging and overworking?